Trumped-up Trademarks – or – How are you today?: I’m Peachy

by Dennis Crouch

As Congress moves forward impeaching President Donald Trump, business-minded Americans are also looking for ways to monetize the process.  The following are a few recent trademark applications.  Some are still pending while others have been abandoned after receiving rejections from trademark examiners at the US Patent & Trademark Office.

IMPEACH 45. President Trump is the 45th President and so the meaning of this proposed mark (IMPEACH 45) is clear. The USPTO examiner caught the implication and rejected the application “because the applied-for mark consists of or includes something identifying a particular living individual whose written consent to register the mark is not of record.”  The applicant then abandoned the registration application. A slightly more cryptic mark made it through the registration process.  The image to the right shows the general prohibition sign  (“no-sign”) covering the number 45 that is now a registered mark owned by Kamyar Shadan of Tiburon, CA.

Back in August 2016, it looked like Hillary Clinton would be No. 45.  Thus when Mark Allan filed for IMPEACH THAT BITCH, the TM examiner similarly found that the proposed mark improperly “identifies Hillary Clinton, a living individual.”  That registration application has also been abandoned. Other anti-Hillary registration applications include ANYBODY BUT CLINTON, WOMEN AGAINST CLINTON, and the catchy HILLARY.CON. These registration applications have all been abandoned.

Future Impeachments: One way to potentially overcome the prohibition on registering a mark identifying another person (without their permission) is to register the mark of a future identifier.  Thus, a Florida Attorney (Mitch Soligan) has already filed for rights on IMPEACH 46. Folks better start paying attention to who is running for VP.

MAGA: President Trump’s arguably misdescriptive slogan “Make America Great Again” is a registered mark owned by DONALD J. TRUMP FOR PRESIDENT, Inc. Ellen Lust filed her competing application with a catchy addition – “Make America Great Again Impeach Trump.”  The Senior markholder (trump-for-president) filed a pre-registration letter of protest and examiner refused to register the mark.

Although American, Lust is a professor of political science at the University of Gothenburg in Sweden. I reached out to Prof. Lust for more information, but she has not responded.

Impeach the President – This abandoned application was filed in 2018 for a board game. Unfortunately, I believe we are still waiting to see the actual game.  Although there is a logo (below) and a website:


Impeach the Cheat is a pending TM application filed November 2019 that includes an interesting graphic. “The mark has a meaning of justice being served to an individual for wrong-doing in public office.”  This one is graphically interesting with its allusion to Nixon.

Finally, my favorite is the IMPEACHMINTS – Peach Flavored Mints – that quaintly stretch back to GWB. Hopefully there is no bitter aftertaste.



32 thoughts on “Trumped-up Trademarks – or – How are you today?: I’m Peachy

  1. 10

    Any updates on “the game” as regards NOT delivering the articles to the Senate?

    Does Pelosi realize how bad she is making the Dems look in this ongoing game (that makes ALL of Congress and the Executive branches look like that would rather be playing fiddles)…?

  2. 9

    Only Dennis Crouch could think of taking both the anxiety provoking impeachment process and the arcane complexity of trademark law and turn it into a fun and funny blog post. Great job Prof. Crouch. I needed the laugh.

    FYI: I fortunately live only 3 hours from the Canadian border in case this impeachment process turns ugly and need to get out of Dodge in a hurry. People are not comprehending the gravity of this situation but those that do can only whistle past the graveyard.

    1. 9.1

      One aspect of the gravity of the situation is that BOTH parties only care for themselves and their own agenda.

  3. 6

    We should get back to the issues which really matter.

    If Trump had applied for a patent claiming a method of impeaching a President Trump back when it was truly inconceivable that Trump could be president, would it be ineligible?

  4. 5

    “As Congress moves forward impeaching President Donald Trump…”

    Congress? Pretty sloppy writing for someone who used to be a lawyer. The House is going to have a party-line vote to impeach the President. And then the Senate won’t do anything further, and he’ll stay in office. And next November, the voters are going to keep Mr. Trump in the White House.

      1. 5.1.1

        You should not be surprised.

        While certainly MANY MORE of his comments deserve the treatment of being shunted away from those attempting a dialogue (or even merely expressing an opinion on patent law matters), Malcolm has had more posts expunged than anyone else — ever.

        Malcolm has had more posts expunged than everyone else combined — ever.

    1. 2.1

      Pretty easy Josh: impeach is only a set of charges. In and of themselves, they neither remove the President, nor do they prevent a re-election of the same.

      Trump 45 gets impeached.
      In the cliff-hanger season finale , the Senate does not convict, and the show ends with hints of ticker tape falling and partially obscuring a “Trump 46 — we told you” banner.

      In other words, BOTH sides of the aisle still don’t get it, and the misery of Trump continues.

      1. 2.1.1

        Yes, the “misery”. Literally every American is better off than they were 3 years ago. Pure misery.


          Wow. Inhale the mind-numbing idi-ocy of a rich white pr-ick patent attorney!

          Everybody Rich Whitey knows is “doing better” than 3 years ago. Just look at that 401k!

          Oh it’s just a glorious time in America for “everybody”.

          What a f—-king @-h0le.

      2. 2.1.2

        Sure, authoritarian Repu-k-k-le criminals and their ps-ych-0 leaders burning the country down or selling it to the highest bidder are the fault of … Democrats. Makes total sense!

        Glibertarians really are the brownest sh-tst-ains has on humanity.


          Your one bucketing is noted.

          As is your resemblance to the very person you despise.

          Oh, how that cognitive dissonance rings out.

  5. 1

    This is mostly off-topic, but it should be allowed to disappear down the memory hole: Pres. Trump famously declared that “Trade wars are good, and easy to win.”

    Honestly, I do not know what it means to “win” a trade war, but in any event the president started one with China on 5 July 2019. The census bureau‘s latest trade figures only run to Oct 2019 (we do not, in other words, have figures yet for Nov 2019), but in the four month’s since the July 2019 start of the trade war, our average trade deficit with China has actually been higher than the deficit for the four months before the start of the trade war. In other words, if “winning” counts as lowering the trade deficit, then we have been losing.

    Meanwhile, the details announced today for the putative deal that has been struck to end the trade war hold that China is agreeing to purchase essentially the same dollar value of U.S. products that one would have predicted from trendlines over the last few years.

    In other words, there is really no obvious “victory” that can be discerned after all of the effort. I hope that this is borne in mind next time some blowhard talks about it being “easy” to “win” a trade war.

    1. 1.1

      “… but it should be allowed to disappear down the memory hole…”

      Er, “but it should not be allowed to disappear down the memory hole… .” Mea culpa.

    2. 1.2

      {Donald Trump from the Oval Office}

      My Fellow Americans.

      The evil Democrats (and they are evil, believe me, and so is the fake media) have now impeached me and want to remove me from office.

      If they are successful (and they won’t be, believe me), this would be the worst mistake in the history of the world (and I know what I’m talking about because I am the smarted man in the history of the world).

      I am charged with bribing the Ukranians to get dirt on Biden and his son for my personal gain so I will win the next election.

      That is so phoney, so fake, and so unfair.

      I did not do it for my personal benefit. I did it for the benefit of this country. For you and your family. In fact, I did it for the benefit of the entire world (except for that Greta person. How dare they put her on the cover of that fake magazine as person of the year and not me. I became President by the biggest landslide in this country’s history. And I am going to have Crooked Hilary locked up, and Mexico is going to pay for it.) I am the person of the year. In fact I am the person of the century. I am the greatest person in the history of the world, believe me.)

      I never wanted to be President. The only reason I ran was to get all the free publicity for my brand, the Trump brand. We have Trump Towers in almost every major city in the world with more to come. My towers (Trump Towers) are the best towers that have every been built. My resorts (like Trump Maralago, Trump Doral, and that one in Scotland only a short drive from that beautiful airport) are the best resorts in the world. And if you act now you can still book a vacation at the Trump Doral by going to link to But do it now, the rooms are going fast.

      Being your President is the worst job I have ever had. It certainly pays the least of any job I have every had, especially when I worked for my Father. Being President has done nothing but cost me money. Lots of money. Lots and lots of money. You have no idea how much money being President has cost me, believe me.

      This is why my being re-elected President is so important for the world (and why I bribed the Ukranians to help me be re-elected).

      You know all those stories about aliens from other planets (and I don’t mean Mexico and Guatemala)? And the stories about the crash at Roswell? And about people be abducted and probed?

      They are all true. When I became President I was briefed and shown the videos.

      The aliens have come here to destroy all of humanity and take our planet, our beloved plant Earth. (They prefer a warmer planet so they are ones who are causing global warming.)

      I started negotiating with them as soon as I became President and I am the greatest negotiator in the history for the world. In fact, I have saved the world, believe me.

      But negotiations are still going on and my alien friends have told me that if they don’t continue (and only with me) they will consider that an act of bad faith and will go back to their plan to destroy all humans. Except for that Greta person. For some reason they like her. Frankly, I don’t see why, but they do.

      So that is why it so critical for me to be re-elected President. I am the only one who can save the human race. And that is why I bribed the Ukranians. It was not for my personal gain, it was to save the world. And that is not an impeachable offense. (Not that it matters, I am going to dismiss Congress, have all of the evil Democrats rounded up and sent to re-education camps in Russia. My friend Vladimir says they are almost as nice as my Trump Doral).

      The aliens have already started living among us.

      You know my senior policy advisor Stephen Miller? He came up with the brilliant plan to separate children from their parents and put them in cages. Absolutely brilliant. He is from the alien race of Reptilians. The ones who evolved from snakes. The reason so many children cannot be found to be reunited with their parents is because the Reptilians are eating them. Well, sometimes sacrifices have to be made and they are not white Americans anyway.

      And there is Mitch McConnell. He is obviously also a Reptilian. He comes from the branch that evolved from turtles.

      And so, I will make America Great Again and save the Human Race but only if you keep me as President.

      Believe Me.


    3. 1.3

      “I hope that this is borne in mind next time some blowhard talks about it being “easy” to “win” a trade war.”

      It won’t be. The people who need the lesson now will refuse to see it, and then if he loses the other side with rah-rah a different flavor of protectionism.

      1. 1.3.1

        The people who need the lesson now will refuse to see it…

        You are probably right about this, but let me just say that if they refuse to see it, it will not be because I failed to point this out to them. I plan to make myself downright insufferable in reiterating the hard lessons of this recent misadventure.

        Incidentally, while it might be hard to “win” a trade-war, it is very easy to “win” a trade negotiation. You have your actuaries figure out what the smallest possible tariff rates are that will nevertheless bring in enough revenue to support the necessary customs infrastructure, and then you announce at the negotiations

        I am setting my tariffs down to this level. You can do what you want on your side. If you want to make your citizens pay more for essential goods and services—and maybe even subsidize consumption by my citizens—that is your own look out. I am going to maximize the welfare of my citizens, however, by liberating them to make their own decisions about buying and selling, and may the Devil take the hindmost.

        I have confidence that I am the person who knows best what is in my interest; and you are the person who knows best what is in your interest; and Ms. Smith of Davenport is the person who knows best what is in the interest of Ms. Smith of Davenport. Our president (mistakenly) believes that we need him to make decisions for us about what we buy and sell, and look where that misbegotten notion has gotten us.

    4. 1.4

      Your logic is unassailable. Clearly, we have lost the trade war with China, just as the Colonists lost the Revolutionary War, the Union lost the Civil War, and the Allies lost WWII. Except that battle != war.

      1. 1.4.1

        It is easy enough to tell who won the revolutionary war, because each side had clear goals going into that war. The colonists wanted independence, the British wanted to keep the colonies under the U.K.’s rule. It is clear what outcome actually obtained (U.S. independence), so it is clear who won. Same for the civil war and WWII.

        What was our goal going into the “trade war” with China? Show me documentary evidence that folks at the start of this dispute were saying “we need to achieve X, Y, & Z,” and then show me that X, Y, & Z were achieved. Otherwise, I really do not know what it means to speak of “winning” a trade war.


          It’s easy enough to tell who won those wars because they’re over. Speaking of who’s winning wars while they’re still being fought is mere rhetoric.

      2. 1.4.2

        Incidentally, I do not think that anyone would characterize the Revolutionary War, the Civil War, or WWII as “good and easy to win.” The last two especially stand out as some of the hardest fought and bloodiest wars in history. It seems to me that at the point where you are comparing the present trade conflict with China to those three wars, you are essentially conceding that Pres. Trump’s “easy to win” line was nonsense.

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